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The only thing I wish my son to learn (better than anything)


Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’m doing this on daily basis nor I’ve suddenly decided to “love the world”. I’ve build this strong belief along the years like everyone else.

Let me summarise you the reasons behind this:

1 – is about politics. You might hate politics because you hate politicians but politics is maybe one the the most important thing in every collaboration, society etc. Among other definitions, politics is the ability to meat your goal. You don’t just blindly help others. You need first to identify the right people for your effort. Many people are just dead ends. For start, help people with good character. They know what reciprocity means so

2 – helping others means you are being helped. Reciprocity is engraved in our DNA. Is what makes us a society.

3 – learning trustworthiness. I don’t have enough words to say how important is this. And you probably know this already.

4 – understanding people’s needs. Any success comes to just that. So first you you do it to understand them and after a while you do it because you understood them. First kind of help comes from empathy and basic education. Is reactive. Second type of help is mostly proactive.

5 – teaching how to build a strong personal network. Let’s assume that you’re very good in design or programming. You are humble and hard working. So what? No one knows you, no one recommends you. You sit in a dark corner as if you don’t exist.

6 – gives you a big, juicy feeling of bonding and gratitude. And you know what? This is what happiness is all about. Also, anytime you’re thinking about divorce or loosing a friend, understand what you’ve lost: emotional connectivity and gratitude.

7 – a very deep understanding that you can hardly accomplish something meaningful without other people. No matter how good you are.

So again: why I want my son to learn to help others? Because he will create healthy connections with people. Is the only way to be loved and be happy. As simple as that.

Photo Credits: Adrian Costea (model: Tudor Costea)

Adrian Costea